The Life of Potato Parents:
You know that all potatoes have eyes. Well, Mr. and Mrs. Potato had eyes for each other,
and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, whom they called 'Yam.'
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the
facts of life. They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get
accidentally mashed and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a
bunch of Tater Tots. Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and
make a rotten potato out of her! But, on the other hand, she wouldn't stay home and
become a Couch Potato, either. She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny
like her Shoestring cousins. When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told
Yam to watch out for the Hard Boiled guys from Ireland. And the greasy guys from France
called the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so
she wouldn't get scalloped. Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and
wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of
the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.' Mr.
and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University) so that when she
graduated she'd really be in the Chips. But in spite of all they did for her, one
day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw. Tom Brokaw! Mr. and
Mrs. Potato were very upset. They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw
because he's just a...
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